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Am I Ok With Being {Just a Mom}?

Am I Ok With Being Just a Mom

All I ever wanted to be when I grew up was a mom. Sure, I went through phases during my childhood of wanting a career in various fields…a vet (until I realized I’d have to be around blood and give shots to animals), a nurse (until I realized I’d have to be around blood and give shots to humans), a country singer (my demo tapes are quite something), and a backup dancer for New Kids on the Block (hey, a girl can dream). But the one thing that I never wavered on was my desire to be a mom.

My dream did indeed come true. I am now the mother of 4. And, I have been a stay at home mom for almost an entire 18 years. I worked full-time for four years and part-time for a few more years, but I have always been {just a mom}.

Lately, I have found myself struggling with the question of, “Am I ok with being just a mom?” When someone asks me what I do for a living, my response is always “I stay home with my kids. I’m just a mom.” My response sounds like I am ashamed, feel inadequate and embarrassed that being “just a mom” is all that I am. I don’t have a fabulous career that I love, but I also don’t have a mediocre job that I hate. And honestly, I’ve never had the desire to have either one. I am {just a mom}. That’s it.

What is the issue if all I ever wanted to be is a mom and I don’t have a desire to work outside of the home? Well, just because I don’t have a desire to have a career doesn’t mean I don’t have other ambitions I would like to pursue. I am quite a passionate advocate for equal rights. And, I volunteer with several organizations doing everything from e-mailing government officials to working and canvassing at local events.

I would LOVE to be more active and available for more things. But, there is always something happening with the kids.

I would LOVE to someday start my own non-profit to raise awareness to equality issues. But, when will I ever be able to put in the time to make that happen?

I would LOVE to go back to school one day and finish my degree. But, who has time to go back to college when you are raising 4 kids?

Do I take the time now and pursue these dreams? Or do I wait until my bigs are in college and I only have 2 kids to manage? Maybe I should wait until #4 is out of the house and then do it when I’m 55. By then, hubby and I might just sell our house, buy an RV and get the hell out of dodge to celebrate all 4 kids being gone! 

The truth is, I don’t know what the answer is to any of these questions. As moms, we are always putting our own needs, desires and wants on the back burner for our kid’s. Is that what we should be doing? Does our job description include putting our own dreams on the backburner? Can we be both {just a mom} and pursue our ambitions? Aren’t we suppose to feel completely fulfilled by motherhood? I know plenty of moms that seem to have figured out what works for them and kudos to you if you have. I guess I am still trying to figure it out for myself.

What I do know is that right now, at this phase in my life with my 4 beautiful and amazing kids, I am perfectly content with being {just a mom}. Maybe one day I will fulfill my dreams and goals and figure out how to do it all, but for right now, I am going to savor this {just a mom} phase with no shame.

Who knows, maybe in 15 years, New Kids on the Block will still need backup dancers.

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One Response to Am I Ok With Being {Just a Mom}?

  1. Diane Fungaroli March 27, 2017 at 10:35 am #

    Sarah… your sense of humor and all you are and are doing. Four children qualifies you as multi talented in all areas including to name a few: cooking, teaching, making art, WRITING, along with providing care and LOVE! You will know in your heart if and when it is time to DANCE outside your home!