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The Internal Maternal Battle: Rookie Mom VS. Veteran Mom

The Internal Maternal Battle

LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

There is a constant battle going on in my head between the mom I am with #1 vs the mom I am with #4. Should I be the “uptight, crazy protective, did everything by the book, helicopter mom who never let him out of my sight” mom or the “super relaxed, laid back, he’ll figure it out himself, at least I didn’t lose him today” mom? The truth is, by kid #4, I don’t have the time nor the desire to be the first mom.

Here’s What I’m Talking About::

I didn’t take #1 out of the house for the first 6 weeks of his life. 



I left the hospital with #4 at 2 days old and went straight to the pumpkin patch with the other 3 kids.

The Internal Maternal Battle
Life doesn't stop when you have #4. Straight from the hospital to the pumpkin patch!

I called the doctor at least once a week during the first year of #1’s life for the craziest reasons. The best one—thought he had crystals in his pee (yes, that is a real thing). Turns out his diaper was so full that the gel material that is inside diapers, started coming apart.



#4 has rarely seen our doctor. 103 fever? A lukewarm bath and some Tylenol should do the trick.

#1 has a baby book with every page filled out- including every tooth lost until he was 10 & has beautiful scrapbooks with every major milestone documented with embellishments and die cuts.



#4 doesn’t even have a baby book. There are a few post-it notes with random milestone dates written on them that are in a shoe box.

I bought every baby proofing contraption on the market for #1—cabinet locks, outlet covers, toilet seat locks, furniture corner covers, oven knob covers, & cord shorteners (yep, it’s a real thing).



When #4 came along, I used an elastic hair band around the cabinet handles in the bathrooms.

I taught #1 two languages, shapes, colors, letters and he could write his name by the age of 2.



I turn on Nick Jr. and hope #4 learns something educational.

#1 was potty trained at 2 years old and it only took one weekend.



#4 will still be crapping his pants by age 10.

I planned the most extravagant birthday parties for #1- complete with homemade invitations, decorations & themed foods for 50 of our closest friends.



I forgot his 1st birthday (mom of the year). I ended up taking him shopping and letting him pick out his own gifts. Which worked to his advantage– mom guilt = pick out anything you want!

The Internal Maternal Battle
My actual Facebook post confessing that I forgot #4's 1st birthday!

To say I was super strict on what movies and TV shows I allowed #1 to watch would be an understatement. The first PG-13 movie he saw, was on his 13thbirthday.



#4 has been watching NC-17 since birth.

#1 had the mom who volunteered in his class at least 3 days a week & embarrassed Martha Stewart with my made from scratch treats I brought in for the class on a regular basis.



#4 will be lucky if I remember his teacher’s name & bring in a box of store bought donut holes.

If #1 fell down and got hurt, 911 was already on speed dial and on their way.



Unless #4 is bleeding or has a bone sticking out, he’s fine.

I remember the age #1 was when he did his first everything… first lost tooth, first haircut, first wave, first bite of solid food.



I have to look on the calendar on my phone to remember #4’s birthday.

Even though #1 and #4 are being raised by completely different moms, they have one thing in common – they are both loved more than they will ever know. 

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