Civil rights activist Maya Angelou would roll over in her grave at the way women blog and rant on Facebook these days. I get it. I do feel more connected to you — and even like you a little more — when you admit your flaws. When you are vulnerable and honest, I see that you are human, just like me, and think, “Hey, I could totally be friends with this person!”
But, the truth is, I want to see my friends shine, too. I know some of you are striving to be your very best self, and I want to — I need to — see that side of you. I want to hear about how you ran farther than you ever have or how your husband showered you with fresh flowers and the sweetest love note. I love that you cook healthy food and limit your kids’ screen time. It is awesome that you find time to work out three times a week, run a business and care for three children. I am right there with you setting intentions and writing goals to co-create my ideal life. And seeing what works for you helps me. Better yet, it inspires me.
I have friends who do incredible things, and I love them for it. I once wrote a lengthy post on Facebook about how I wished I were doing X, Y, and Z things that it seemed everyone else was doing. So, I was shocked when several friends wrote back saying, “Hey, I wish I had pieces of your life, too!” It helped me to realize I have a fan-freaking-tastic life, and I am a badass at a lot of things. And best of all? I am always improving and growing myself. I have friends who love that about me. I love that about me.
I want to share my self-love in hopes that you can dare to sparkle a little more. Don’t focus quite as much on your flaws and failures. As much as it helps to be heard, know that you are not alone in the life-is-tough club, don’t forget to also share your victories with the world. We all need and want to see more of what makes you great.
In the most profound passage from A Return To Love, Marianne Williamson writes,
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.”
You do not have to suck or be forever self-deprecating for people to like you or be able to relate to you. You do not have to shrink yourself to fit the world. The world needs to grow into your glory. (And it will if you just let it.)
Yes, there will be hard times, epic failures, belly flops and floppy bellies. Own it, and keep going. Be grateful for everything you have and share that gratitude with others. More of the good and less ranting about what pisses you off so much. What you focus on is what your reality will resemble; where you put your attention is what will fill your world. It’s the natural law of attraction. So share what makes your heart sing, and please fill mine with your funny, beautiful and joyous selves. I am talking to all of you — every single mommy, sister, blogger, nurse, teacher, the list goes on. You are a super woman! And we are watching and cheering you on.